Ghosts.

Recently, someone asked me why I like ghosts so much. There are many reasons why I like ghosts but one of them is because I feel like one. Hovering hollow in time that rests beside the end of time. Fat with history and full of experience, yet incapable of touching the tangible. I struggle with … More Ghosts.

skinnydipped

To state the obvious, 2021 was a challenging year. It was also a great year in some ways (for me, anyway). It has been nearly five years since I received my autism diagnosis, which I noticed when going back through my blog. Nothing and everything has changed regarding that diagnosis. Recently, I’ve introduced the sunflower … More skinnydipped

Chaos Defined

Going through some of my old poetry that was written before I received my autism diagnosis sure is an experience. So many poems written about so many confusing, confounded and unhealthy situations. Those confusing, confounded and unhealthy situations make a lot more sense now. The pain from the whys, because, what-should-haves in those dated words … More Chaos Defined

“Nobody wants to be here and nobody wants to leave.” – Cormac McCarthy

I have so much to say about so many things but now that I’m sat down and able to take the time to type them, I don’t know where to begin. I’ve been furloughed from work, which I expected to happen but not quite as soon as it has. While it isn’t the worst thing … More “Nobody wants to be here and nobody wants to leave.” – Cormac McCarthy

Speaking in Public

I’ve mutually volunteered/been asked to do a presentation at work about autism in the workplace. I feel kind of excited about it but also a bit unsure of where to start. There are so many things to say but don’t want to say everything as to not overload people. A million questions swirling and consuming … More Speaking in Public

My Autistic Brain

Oh, hello there. It’s been awhile. 5 points if that sentence reminded you of that Staind song “It’s Been Awhile”. :-p I’ve been doing some thinking lately about what autism is for people. More specifically, what it is for me. Because, I figure, the more I understand my own autistic brain, the better I can … More My Autistic Brain

Oh, What It Would Be To Have A Heart Made Of Armor

I feel like a ghost most days. This feeling intensifies when I am in a very social situation with people in loud, chaotic, multiple-conversations-happening-at-once setting. I have a very difficult time functioning in this type of setting, no matter if the mood is happy or not, so I don’t really engage and end up usually … More Oh, What It Would Be To Have A Heart Made Of Armor

Sensory Profile FTW

Part of my (very) lengthy assessment involved analyzing my sensory profile. I scored significantly high (if you can call it that) for sensory avoiding and sensory sensitivity. NOW I understand why I run away from social situations so much among other things. I’ve gotten really good at disappearing from social engagements without being seen. I … More Sensory Profile FTW