Photo by Jake Givens on Unsplash

Moving While Not Moving

Musings

There’s a kind of catharsis that comes along with big news, big changes, big events.

For me, it sometimes feels like that big piece of new information becomes part of who I am

and I think to myself “Okay, this is me now” and I get sort of complacent in that space.

Usually after about a nanosecond of feeling that way, I tell myself that life isn’t about complacency.

Not for me anyway.

It’s about continually tilling and digging to discover more about who I am and the world I’m in.

I like to always be moving.

Always working toward something.

Always philosophising about something.

Always doing.

Always.

Ironic, maybe, that one of my favorite activities is sitting on the lawn and doing nothing.

But I’m not really doing nothing.

I’m feeling the combination of cool earth and soft down of the grass.

Feeling the cool or warm or crisp or balmy breeze.

Feeling the nurturing glow of the sun.

Feeling.

And smelling all the magnificent smells of spring (right now, anyway).

I’m currently reading a book about quantum biology that analyzes smell.

It’s a pretty freakin’ remarkable process.

But I digress.

Being enveloped by nature helps me deepen my understanding of what it means to be alive.

It’s pretty incredible that we get to experience life on a planet as opposed to viewing one from the distance.

So I like to always be physically and mentally doing even if it looks like I’m doing nothing sometimes.

Moving while not moving.

I guess that’s kind of a big part of who I am.

Music. Music. Music.

music

I love music.

It’s pretty much one of my most favorite things in life.

OF ALL TIME.

I remember always enjoying music of many, many genres. When I was a kid, I used to pretend I was in my own music video in the backyard or I would set up elaborate stage productions with my toys and put on a tape of Debbie Gibson.

Nerd alert.

I used to sneak into my brothers’ room and listen to their CDs while playing Mario Bros, Donkey Kong, Street Fighter and other now-delightfully-retro games on our Super Nintendo. I also attribute MTV to raising me in some regards, which is fairly terrifying prospect (jokes) but I really do feel exposure to bands/artists like Eurythmics, Culture Club and David Bowie have made me truly appreciate differences in gender and sexuality.

One of the few stress relievers I have that actually works is to listen to music really loud that is fully articulating my feelings in strings, drums, beats, guitars, screams, purrs, keys and so on. I am obsessed with the composition; trying to hear every single note on each instrument in a song to create this melody. It envelopes me and takes me on a journey. I legit get entirely consumed by the noises booming from speakers.

But then it gets too much after a certain period of time and it physically hurts my ears.

So I turn it off, put on the armor the music has given me and step out into the world.

It’s a straight up luxury when I get the spare time to really listen to music these days. Most of the time the iPod is the option while walking to work.

And that’s okay. It helps me see all of the beautiful little everyday nature elements like dew drops, spiderwebs sparkling in sunlight, budding flowers or vibrant ladybugs.

It helps bring color into my world.